I used to worry about being a good parent and whether my children liked me. I would place all of my time and attention ensuring they knew they were loved and ensuring I felt liked and loved.

When I think back, I remember spending every moment entertaining them; this is how I used my time and energy each day. My well intended efforts worked for the most part, but ultimately ended up training them to be dependent on attention from others and needing to be entertained.  

It wasn’t until the introduction to open intelligence that everything changed. I began relaxing for short moments, just a moment whenever I remembered. I relaxed in the midst of all my ideas, expectations and feelings around being a mother, as well as all of the button pushers of impatience, frustration, anger and annoyance that naturally arise in parenting. 

Through this one simple change, with the support of the Happy Parent Network, I gained familiarity with always on stability, love and ease that is inherent to us all, including our children. Immediately there was benefit. I felt comfortable in my own skin, knowing that I was just fine as I was, and that my children were fine too. I didn’t need to change myself or them in order for there to be love.

With the commitment to relying on open intelligence and allowing all data, (thoughts, emotions and experiences) to be as it is, my relationship with my children expanded into beautiful open hearted relating, natural presence, clarity and stability, resulting in always on love, not time or activity dependent. 

By taking responsibility for our own data, relaxing moment to moment, there is the demonstration of stability within ones experience regardless of circumstances. Through relaxing with our data, just as it is, we tap into our power to know incredible wisdom and beneficial responsiveness based on what is needed moment to moment in parenting.

The boon for me now is that my children know how much I love them, how much I care, no matter where I am or what I am doing or what they are doing. We all house this inherent altruism and goodness naturally. By taking short moments of open intelligence until short moments go continuous and allowing data to be as it is, we acknowledge this inherent well-being not only for ourselves, but for our kids too.

Posted by Cheyenne Rivers